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The Fear of Failure

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I the only reason that I am where I am right now is because I’ve failed in the things I have tried to do more than the average person. I’ve failed a lot! Not just on my weight loss journey (I used to be 17 and a half stone, I’ll have you know), but also in other aspects of my life – my career, my lifestyle, with the people around me.

But that makes sense though, right?

You don’t get success without  a bit of failure along the way.

Like I say, I’ve lost count of my failures, and I am sure you are thinking about yours right now..

Like yourself, my successes have been few and far between. However, each success that I have had has been hugely satisfying.

I got there in the end with my weight loss. No longer am I 17 and an half stone, I’m now more 13 and half stone – well built and more athletic (which was my goal). I’ve taken the time to learn about me. If you want to succeed, you have to be prepared to learn about you, and what works for you. This doesn’t just relate to losing a bit of weight. This relates to absolutely anything in your life.

You have to recognise that you are different to me and to the person sitting next to you. Something will work for you that doesn’t for them and vice versa. Be accepting of that, and adapt accordingly.

Anyway, I thought you’d appreciate the underlying message that I have learnt from all of my failures…

We all start off with some kind of “goal”, “objective”, “desire” – a desired outcome for a better way of putting it.

That outcome is always based on what you want in life…or at least, what you say you want. There is a massive difference between the two statements.

So, we make a start on this adventure or journey towards this desired outcome.

We start doing some things that we hope will make the goal well…happen!

Then…suddenly…life gets in the way, you experience something that you may not have expected or something that you just plain do not want to experience.

It could be:

  • A rejection
  • A little fear
  • A setback

It will be something that makes us too uncomfortable to keep going – it could be the peer pressure of having to go out drinking with friends when you are trying so hard to curb your alcohol intake, it could be something completely different.

Whatever it is…

It causes us to STOP…or to try and manouvre around the problem…and it just doesn’t work.

So we quit – simple as that!

Why does this happen?, I hear you ask

**Note this down, right now!!**

You simply believe the thought that your current level of personal comfort, is more important than what you say you want and desire

Boom!! That’s the take home message today!

Just take a moment to read that again.

Many people (like you and me) say they want something, but when push comes to shove and things do not go quite right the first time…

They prefer to stay where they are in life – simple as that.

So I’d have you consider this: Most people therefore actually like their current reality and they DO NOT want to change.

Why do I say that?

Nobody is doing anything about changing. They continue to do the same things that has created their current reality…even when they say they hate it.

At the end of the day you are avoiding doing what’s required, you just do ‘stuff’ to say you are doing something.

It’s why in the new year most people go low carb for a bit, lose a bit of water weight, then binge again and wonder why the weight has come back.

Something is not working here.

Yet they are still doing it…

Because it’s ‘comfortable’ for them – they know what to do and what to expect.

Embrace your failures and learn from them. Don’t be a afraid to get a bit uncomfortable in trying to change for the better. Tell me what you are trying to do, maybe I can make your path a bit clearer. You never know until you ask.

Happy Monday,
Josh


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